Sinking Deeper

I feel the numbness setting in. Depression is sinking deeper, I don’t wish to stop her. Her familiarity, though painful, is soothing. I know the routine she will set, I know the things that will not get done, and the extra sleeping I will do. I feel myself hollow out as time goes on. Feeling less like myself and more like a husk amongst the living. I will move as before, but numb and simply just there. There physically. Speaking just enough to be left alone, but not enough to stop feeling alone. I will feel better eventually, but for now this feels nice. I will allow myself to feel this fully, in my entirety. Then get back to being better. Her claws paw in my chest. I will shoo her away eventually, but not this day. She may do as she pleases today.

-AW